TOUGH BEING A ‘SPARE'

The queen is only too aware of the struggles Harry is facing after seeing echoes in the troubled life of her sister

- NICI DE WET

DUTY before all else – that’s been Her Majesty’s motto since she first sat on that formidable throne 68 years ago.

And she expects it of her family members too. Being born into a position of privilege and prestige is one thing but they’re here to serve the public – and they should never forget that.

Yet Queen Elizabeth, who has at times been accused of favouring a stiff upper lip over displays of warmth and emotion, has a soft side too. And those in the know say it’s been abundantly evident in the way she’s treated her grandson, Harry, recently. The monarch has graciously allowed Prince Harry to walk away from the palace. Disappointed she may be, but there’s one thing she was never going to do and that was humiliate her vulnerable, clearly unhappy grandson.

And why? Because she understands what he’s going through.

The queen is treating Harry with kid gloves to a certain extent because she watched her younger sister, Princess Margaret, struggle in her shadow.

“She has a particular sensitivity to Harry because of her closeness to Margaret and seeing the same dramas and tensions played out two generations ago,” royal biographer Robert Lacey says.

Like Margaret, Harry was essentially raised as a “royal spare”: the younger sibling to the heir to the throne, forced to take a back seat and watch as the older sibling – Prince William, in Harry’s case – took centre stage.

Carving their own path was always going to be difficult for both Margaret and Harry, and Lacey believes the queen is deeply sympathetic to this.

It played a major part in her recent decision to let Harry step down from his royal duties and seek out a new life in Canada with Meghan and baby Archie.

“The younger-sibling syndrome is an enduring problem,” Lacey says.