Work-Life Balance Is A Sham

It’s time to blow this outdated idea to smithereens! Attaining perfect harmony just isn’t possible. And knowing that is the first step to more bliss, better health and greater success.

- Anna Breslaw

Like most women, my days are packed. I race from pre-school drop-off-to meetings, back to my desk to hit a writing deadline, then to a dinner or an event. I’m usually back at my laptop again at 9pm after I’ve wrestled/negotiated/ overpromised my four- and two-year-olds into bed. Or maybe I’ve convinced my husband that it’s his turn again (it isn’t) so I can finish the thing that’s been on my to-do list for four days and still isn’t done. This isn’t an “I’m so important” humblebrag. Most days, I’m just exhausted.

For the past two years, my life has been full to the brim as I’ve been working on my book, The Big Life, about the evolving values of young women seeking a new idea of how relationships and family fit together around their career ambitions. While researching it, I’ve met with hundreds of women from all kinds of backgrounds, most of them deeply anxious about this concept of “balance”.

My take: it’s all life all the time and all work all the time; the pieces don’t exist in a vacuum. And this search for work-life balance is leaving women hobbled with guilt and anxiety. Want some proof? In the Women’s Health –The Big Life survey of nearly 1 000 women, 43 percent said they feel they’ve achieved work life balance, yet 75 percent said they feel guilty about not successfully balancing work and life. Huh? Seems totally incongruous until you dig deeper and realise the upsetting truth: even when women think they’ve achieved the best possible balance they can, they still feel like it’s not good enough. (Did we mention that 72 percent said they feel either drained, exhausted or anxious at the end of the day?) Something is very off here.