BE STRONG,” Xu Lida whispers to himself as he walks along Sanxiang Road in Suzhou, China, a picturesque city some 96 kilometres west of Shanghai. It is early morning on 24 August 1995, and the slight 23-year-old shopkeeper is fighting back tears as he dodges pedestrians, bicycles and vehicles on his way to an outdoor market.
In his right arm he is carrying a basket that holds his tiny, three-day-old daughter Jingzhi. After crossing a busy street he peels back her blanket and checks that she is still asleep. His heart pounding, he reminds himself what he and his wife have decided: We have no choice. He blinks back tears and wraps her up again. Perhaps, one day, she will understand and forgive us.
He reaches the popular market just before 5 a.m. and is relieved to see that it is nearly empty. He can leave his daughter here without being seen. He spots a small tent outside a bicycle maintenance shop. She will stay warm there and someone will surely find her.
He hasn’t slept in more than 24 hours, and as he carries Jingzhi to the tent he begins crying again. He kisses her gently and tucks her basket into the tent, knowing that this is his final farewell. He walks away but doesn’t get far before he stops, compelled to go back. But as he nears the tent, he notices people gathered around it and realizes she has already been discovered.
He hears her cry and knows she will be rescued. But he feels horribly guilty, saddened, devastated. What have I done? Reluctantly he walks away, knowing he will never forget the sound of her crying.
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