HELPING YOUR KIDS ADJUST TO A NEW BABY

The lives and routines of children and teens are dramatically changed when a new baby sibling arrives. Here we look at some pointers to help them adjust to the family member.

The lives of most children or teens involve routine, structure and established inter-family dynamics and relationships including their relationship with you and the time they’re used to having with you. However, when a new baby comes home, both mother and baby (and of course dad!) have very important and specific needs, and as a result your children and teens may react with excitement, happiness, nervousness, jealousy or even anger. So how do you help them adjust to life with a new baby in the house?

The best way is to involve your children with their new sibling right from the start, which will help them to adjust more quickly. Talk to them about how they want to be involved with the baby, but make sure you are still able to spend one-on-one time with your older kids to maintain the strength of your relationship.

COMMON SIBLING FEELINGS TOWARDS A NEW BABY

School-age children will typically have strong feelings about the new family structure which might include:

Being initially happy and excited about having a tiny baby to help care for, but are soon disappointed because the reality of a newborn is different from their idea of what it would be like

Jealous because literally overnight, your main priority is the new baby and your child or children will suddenly feel they have to share or compete for your attention

Irritated and resentful because the new baby cries a lot, disrupts their sleep, creates extra chores, or means they have to wait for your help or attention

Excluded or not as important to you, if you can’t give them as much attention as they’re used to getting from you

Embarrassed - especially if they’re teenagers and the only ones among their friends with a newborn sibling