Do You Feel Like A Fraud?
Fairlady|March 2020
A Dealing with self-doubt is an everyday struggle for a surprising number of people. It’s that little voice that says, ‘You just got lucky.’ ‘They made a mistake; they’re going to figure you out.’ ‘You don’t have what it takes and it’s just a matter of time before you fail.’ Welcome to the Imposter Syndrome club – at the very least, you’re in good company!
Charis Torrance
Do You Feel Like A Fraud?

World-renowned poet, writer and activist Maya Angelou once said, ‘I have written 11 books, but each time I think, “Uh oh, they’re going to find out now. I’ve run a game on everybody, and they’re going to find me out.”’ Albert Einstein had the same nagging feeling; he described himself as an ‘involuntary swindler’ and felt that his work didn’t merit the recognition it had received.

Not many people can claim to share the talents of Angelou or Einstein, but feeling like you don’t deserve recognition for your accomplishments is all too common.

Quick personal story: when FAIRLADY first appointed me, I was pretty sure they’d made some kind of mistake. I was half-expecting to get a call to let me know they’d meant to give the position to someone else – someone more talented and accomplished. And when that didn’t happen, I was sure that by my first six-month review, they’d realise they’d made a terrible mistake. I wish I could say that the feeling has gone away, but I still have that nagging voice in my head every time I submit a story.

What is imposter syndrome?

This story is from the {{IssueName}} edition of {{MagazineName}}.

Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.

This story is from the {{IssueName}} edition of {{MagazineName}}.

Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.

MORE STORIES FROM FAIRLADYView all
'DESIRE IS NOT WHAT MATTERS'
Fairlady

'DESIRE IS NOT WHAT MATTERS'

Emily Nagoski wrote the book on women and desire - literally. And then her own sex life dried up. Here's what a prolonged sex drought (and a load of research) taught her about maintaining intimacy in a long-term relationship.

time-read
9 mins  |
July/August 2024
'We have to tell HARD STORIES'
Fairlady

'We have to tell HARD STORIES'

Theatre director and playwright Yaël Farber is spending time in South Africa after her critically acclaimed run of King Lear at the Almeida Theatre in London. We chatted to her about the importance of the pursuit of truth.

time-read
6 mins  |
July/August 2024
THE WHY, THE WHICH & the wardrobe
Fairlady

THE WHY, THE WHICH & the wardrobe

We really got into it this month! Read on for more on the allure of a loosey-goosey jumpsuit, vintage-hunting and jingle-jangling jewellery, the best places to find quality African design and short-girl styling tips.

time-read
10+ mins  |
July/August 2024
LIFT your GAME
Fairlady

LIFT your GAME

Thought weightlifting was just for bodybuilders and powerlifters? Not so. In fact, 'lifting heavy shit' may be the secret to longevity, hormone regulation and mood for women through perimenopause and beyond.

time-read
8 mins  |
July/August 2024
TREATMENT PLAN ON YOUR MARKS
Fairlady

TREATMENT PLAN ON YOUR MARKS

Armed with a six-month programme from Dr Nerina Wilkinson + Associates, Jennifer Morin set about tackling her sun damage and melasma.

time-read
8 mins  |
July/August 2024
PLAYING YOUR CARDS RIGHT
Fairlady

PLAYING YOUR CARDS RIGHT

Here's how to get the most out of loyalty cards.

time-read
5 mins  |
July/August 2024
BIG SKY Country
Fairlady

BIG SKY Country

Namibia. Twelve friends, five vehicles, 4000 km, thirteen days. Eight punctures, one angle grinder. One martial eagle, one full moon, one ghost town. Plenty of top-quality braais, maybe not quite enough oysters... and the best time ever.

time-read
9 mins  |
July/August 2024
IS YOUR HOME MAKING YOU SICK?
Fairlady

IS YOUR HOME MAKING YOU SICK?

Leaks, damp and poor ventilation in old or poorly built new homes are being fingered for a growing health concern: mould.

time-read
7 mins  |
July/August 2024
HOW TO REALLY GET TO KNOW SOMEONE
Fairlady

HOW TO REALLY GET TO KNOW SOMEONE

The Korean word 'nunchi' describes 'the ability to be sensitive to other people's moods and thoughts'. It's an underrated skill that we seem to have lost.

time-read
9 mins  |
July/August 2024
How to write a memoir
Fairlady

How to write a memoir

Whether you want to share your experiences and insights with the world, leave a legacy or track pivotal experiences for yourself, writing your memoir can be a grand and worthwhile adventure. Here's some advice on how and where to begin.

time-read
7 mins  |
July/August 2024