Come back to us Papa! LOVE CONQUERS POKIES & P ADDICTION
Woman’s Day Magazine NZ|February 10 2020
How the lost dad found his way back to whanau
Cloe Willetts
Come back to us Papa! LOVE CONQUERS POKIES & P ADDICTION

It was love at first sight when Elise Niu saw her husband Ray step out of the car at a touch rugby camp 18 years ago. She announced then and there, “I’m going to marry that guy and have his babies.”

Four children and two weddings later, the couple are still head over heels, juggling family life with a successful gym on the Kapiti Coast. But they’ve overcome challenges that would have destroyed many other couples.

“Our experience has proven you can get through anything with love,” shares Elise, 35, who supported her hubby through a gambling habit and helped him end a nightmare methamphetamine addiction.

“I have so much love for Ray and know how much he loves me, even though he didn’t always show it.”

The couple had their first date at a pub in Palmerston North in 2002 and Elise beams, “As soon as we saw each other, we were inseparable. We hugged like we’d been together forever and it was instant.”

Ray, 37, had been living in Australia and decided to stay in New Zealand for his new romance. Two years later they moved to Sydney, where he picked up work at an oil refinery company. But soon he started gambling.

Softly-spoken Ray admits, “I was 18 the first time and put $2 in a pokie machine, winning hundreds of dollars, which sparked something.”

When his friends in Australia started gambling on weekends, Ray joined in. Within three months of getting a credit card, Ray had secretly racked up $30,000 in debt.

“Some mornings Ray got dressed in his work clothes but caught a train to another suburb to sit on the pokies all day,” tells Elise, who eventually found credit card statements. “I was heartbroken. I felt like I was dealing with someone I didn’t know.”

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