A little attention can build deep connections

To build a life filled with authentic relationships, be proactive, seek out like-minded people, and lend time and care to nurture your tribe

- Jayanthi Madhukar [e-mail]

Loneliness may almost be an epidemic today, but it still remains a taboo topic. How many of us bother to bring up the subject in a social conversation? And if we do discuss it, do we know the strategies to overcome it? To read books on the subject is to understand that the first step to dealing with loneliness is to develop the courage to confront it. For many, the journey begins with recognizing loneliness without shame.

Sameer* (name changed on request), a young widower in his 40s, speaks candidly about his experience over an email interview with me. "After my wife's death four years ago, I felt isolated," he writes before sharing details of how he dealt with it. "I began setting aside an hour each day to sit with my grief, acknowledging it without judgment. The rest of the day, I committed to activities that made me feel more connected to myself and others."

Sameer found solace in befriending a neighbor and going for morning walks with him, attending yoga classes, and cooking wholesome meals for himself.

In her final book, The Joys of Connection, published in September this year after her passing, Dr Ruth Westheimer, America's best-known sex therapist, offers readers 100 strategies to cultivate connections that endure, reminding us that human closeness is achievable, even in our fractured world. Much like Sameer here, Dr Ruth, as she was known by her admirers, prescribes "acknowledging loneliness" as an essential first step toward easing loneliness' grip on oneself. Taking off from Dr Ruth's book, Mint explores some ways you can proactively create connections this holiday season.

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