Expecting Miracles

My dearest friend's wonderful news stirred up my emotions - all of them - and I couldn't let them show

-  VIVIEN BROWN

When your best friend tells you she's pregnant, you're meant to feel joy, aren't you? Not jealousy. I guess when she blurted it, right out of the blue, I was just a bit taken aback. I hadn't seen it coming, and it hurts.

I listen to her bubbling over with excitement and I can't help feeling upset, but I know I mustn't show it.

This is her moment. It's not about me. So, as Lauren jumps up and down gleefully and I fling my arms around her, at least she can't see my face, pressed against her neck and already crinkling up with held-back tears.

She's going to make a great mother. Anyone who knows her will tell you that. We've been mates forever, and have always done everything together. But not this time.

She's only been married to Jason for a year and she's struck lucky so quickly and so easily, whereas Steve and I have been together so long I was practically a child bride, and it just hasn't happened for us.

I still have a thermometer and all my old temperature charts in my bedside drawer, even though I've pretty much given up on them- along with a couple of pregnancy testing kits, just in case I'm ever a few days late, which I never am.