"Bob," he said, "I'm everybody’s friend! I agree with everybody!”
“What if you have to make a choice in an argument?”
“I won’t,” he said, “I’ll be neutral!”
“Which,” I said, “is letting down the friend who is right!”
After they had died, a man and his dog were walking along a road. After a while, they came to a high, white stonewall along one side of the road broken by a tall arch. When he was standing before it, the man saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like pure gold. He and the dog walked towards the gate, and as they got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side. When he was close enough, he called out, “Excuse me, where are we?”
“This is Heaven, sir,” the man answered.
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