Double-act disappointment doesn't dampen the Greens

Not since Ryan Gosling stole the show in Barbie has the supporting actor had such a happy break. Until a few minutes after 2pm, the Green Party was co-led as usual by Carla Denyer and Wassisname, you know, that clean-cut fella in the neat suit and specs?

- JOE MURPHY

Everyone knows Carla: she’s the sassy, smiley, lipsticky star of the show. While Wotchamaflip… he’s absolutely perfect to go on Question Time from Anglesey. More of a consort, really, like a male black widow spider.

So as the Greens gathered in high spirits, whooping and cheering, in Manchester for the first party conference since they won a record four MPs and 2 million votes at the general election, everyone expected the pair to deliver the big leadership speech as a duet. Then at 2pm, fortune beamed upon Ken. Onto the stage came Hannah Spencer, the party’s candidate for Manchester mayor who does a very good impression of Sarah Lancashire in her Coronation Street days, with “some not so good news”.

“Our wonderful co-leader, Carla, is not well,” revealed Hannah. Someone groaned audibly, as though pained. Cue a video message from Carla herself from her hotel room where she is confined for the next three days, missing what promised to be less of a conference and more “a huge celebration”.

“Thanks to Adrian for stepping into the breach,” she added. Adrian? Of course, she means Thingammybob. Adrian Ramsay, co-leader of the Greens, who went unrecognised by 84 per cent of Green voters in a YouGov poll earlier this year.