Labour Of Love
ELLE Australia|September 2018

Women Tend To Carry The Emotional Weight In Relationships – So What We Can Do About It?

Katherine Laidlaw
Labour Of Love

It took Kristine* about a year to realise that something in her seemingly idyllic relationship wasn’t quite right. She and her boyfriend had fallen for each other over long days spent on a coastal road trip. But, 10 months in, she started to notice some red flags in how he approached the necessary tasks that come with keeping a relationship on track. For one, he couldn’t plan ahead. “I rely on you to be my calendar,” he’d tell her when she would comment on his lack of initiative. And when it came to making dinners together, all the details were on her — from coming up with meals they both liked to grocery shopping to remembering to take the chicken out of the freezer in the morning. Her boyfriend also relied on her to spend hours dissecting his emotional state, insisting he wanted to deal with his increasingly serious depression on his own instead of going to a therapist. He would turn every conversation about their relationship, like whether or not they should move in together, into one about how discouraged he felt in his job or how he needed her help to get motivated. “I’d walk away and think, ‘He hijacked that a little bit,’” says Kristine. “I was eager to help, but I hadn’t noticed how much our dynamic had changed. It was way more draining on me than I realised.”

Denne historien er fra September 2018-utgaven av ELLE Australia.

Start din 7-dagers gratis prøveperiode på Magzter GOLD for å få tilgang til tusenvis av utvalgte premiumhistorier og 9000+ magasiner og aviser.

Denne historien er fra September 2018-utgaven av ELLE Australia.

Start din 7-dagers gratis prøveperiode på Magzter GOLD for å få tilgang til tusenvis av utvalgte premiumhistorier og 9000+ magasiner og aviser.

FLERE HISTORIER FRA ELLE AUSTRALIASe alt
Books: Shelf-Care
ELLE Australia

Books: Shelf-Care

Find a little respite in this season’s most exciting new reads

time-read
5 mins  |
June/July 2020
ELLE Australia

Men's Rites

Deciding to go through a gender transition isn’t easy for anyone. But the hardest person for journalist Daniel Mallory ortberg to convince was himself

time-read
10+ mins  |
June/July 2020
Kick Start
ELLE Australia

Kick Start

In these uncertain times, louis vuitton’s artistic director nicolas ghesquière is looking to the past to help make sense of the future

time-read
3 mins  |
June/July 2020
ELLE Australia

Music: Everything Is Illuminated

Phoebe Bridgers is a musician who revels in the darkness, albeit having earned her place in the spotlight

time-read
6 mins  |
June/July 2020
SUPER NATURE ESCAPISM WILDERNESS BREATHING INFRESH AIR BATHING IN SUNSHINE
ELLE Australia

SUPER NATURE ESCAPISM WILDERNESS BREATHING INFRESH AIR BATHING IN SUNSHINE

IN THE SPIRIT OF DISCOVERY AND NEW HORIZONS, MODEL GEORGIA FOWLER HEADS FOR THE GREAT OUTDOORS

time-read
3 mins  |
June/July 2020
ELLE Australia

THE big CLEANSE

WE’VE PURGED OUR KITCHEN CABINETS OF SUGAR AND CULLED THE CLOTHES THAT DON’T SPARK JOY, BUT WE MAY HAVE ARRIVED AT THE MOST BENEFICIAL (AND EASIEST) CLEANSE OF ALL

time-read
6 mins  |
June/July 2020
ELLE Australia

TALKING to strangers

SINCE THE EARLY 1900S, AN AGONY AUNT HAS BEEN A WILLING EAR. BUT AT A TIME OF DMS AND ASKME-ANYTHINGS, SEEKING ADVICE FROM SOMEONE YOU DON’T KNOW HAS BECOME RISKY BUSINESS

time-read
8 mins  |
June/July 2020
singled OUT
ELLE Australia

singled OUT

WE’VE ENTERED AN ERA OF MYRIAD RELATIONSHIP STATUSES – COUPLED, FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS, OPEN, POLYGAMOUS, THREE-DIGITALDATES-IN-BUT UNSURE-WHERE-THIS-IS-GOING. But is flying solo the last taboo?

time-read
5 mins  |
June/July 2020
GYPSY CREEK
ELLE Australia

GYPSY CREEK

INTERIOR DESIGNER LOUELLA BOÌTELGILL TAKES US INSIDE HER QUIRKY BYRON BAY HINTERLAND CREATION, WHICH OVERFLOWS WITH A BEACHY, HAPPY VIBE

time-read
2 mins  |
June/July 2020
DRIVE: DESIGN in motion
ELLE Australia

DRIVE: DESIGN in motion

HOW THE HOTTEST INTERIOR TRENDS COULD DEFINE WHAT YOUR NEXT CAR LOOKS LIKE

time-read
2 mins  |
June/July 2020