Love's Labour Lost

"Why do we need a man if what he does is to make us women feel nothing while slogging to make a family? We can pick up our drink, and food and do things and look after ourselves."

- NISHA CHANDRAN

Growing up in the land of the Taj Mahal the ultimate monument to love, listening to divine love stories of Krishna and Radha, Romeo and Juliet and Laila Majnu, where people were willing to give up their lives for love. Love was idealised and often went against everything practical and logical. Love was encashed and shown in a very highly romanticised way in movies.

Nowadays do people labour for love? Do people still make an effort to be there and show affection and feelings which leads to intimacy? Recently I came into conversation with two gentlemen both of them spiritually aware but they had this idea that Western women are better because they find sex as simple as having a cup of tea. They don't attach feelings to it. Ahem. Arent some of our Indian women the same these days? People defied everything for love. In real life too, there were reflections of lovers going that extra mile to be with the person they loved. Those were the days when love and physical intimacy were considered sacred.

On the other hand, I have also found many foreigners visiting India seeking spiritual solace and soulmates, because they consider Indian women dependable. I recently witnessed a beautiful wedding between a Hyderabadi man and an American lady, both in their 40s joined only by love.

I find a lot of men looking for sex without attachment. It is perhaps due to their inability to form a relationship or issues of commitment. Unless it comes out of a deep mental connection, I don't find meaning in sex.

Physical intimacy in Western culture is often interpreted as something very casual. For them, physical intimacy is vital and they want to find out whether they connect physically too with a partner. If they don't they discontinue the relationship. They don't shame to it having slept with someone most of the Indian men who practise this are relate Interestingly, married!