Variety Show
Top Gear South Africa|November 2019
We’re in a golden age of fast cars. This is going to be blast, unless, of course, there’s a slight medical emergency...
Jack Rix
Variety Show

3PM I'm two laps in, ratcheted into the Atom, concentrating hard and sweating liberally when I feel it. Weight on the outside corner of my eyelid, then the drip as sunblock infused perspiration makes contact with the cornea. Dull warmth builds quickly to an ocular emergency. I wipe frantically with my grimy fingers and make the situation 42 times worse. It’s both sides streaming now, vision terminally blurred, speed and racing line long since abandoned in favor of keeping it out of the gravel. And I can hear them coming…

By this point I’m operating two seconds open, two seconds shut policy – it’s the best I can do. That and pray they see the Atom in time to take evasive action. Sounds like the Jag first, full metal racket, explosions when it spots me and lifts, then more thunder as it flashes past… followed by a higher-pitched, more cultured rasp. The Supra must have been hiding in the Jag’s wake; don’t suspect it’ll keep up for long.

Two down, two to go. Here comes another, spinning hard, longer pauses before the revs start climbing again – that’ll be the Cayman dancing by. I’m nearly back at the pits now – I can make out a red grandstand and a white smudge to my left – the Sagres logo – just one long right-hander before the sanctuary.

But here’s the Merc, snorting and spitting, tires screeching and a whiff of vaporized rubber as it overtakes – I can only assume – fully lit around the outside. I roll to a stop in the pits, mime daggers being repeatedly inserted into my eyes, and retire to the toilet to plunge my head into a sink of cold water. That was fun.

This story is from the November 2019 edition of Top Gear South Africa.

Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.

This story is from the November 2019 edition of Top Gear South Africa.

Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.

MORE STORIES FROM TOP GEAR SOUTH AFRICAView All
Variety Show
Top Gear South Africa

Variety Show

We’re in a golden age of fast cars. This is going to be blast, unless, of course, there’s a slight medical emergency...

time-read
7 mins  |
November 2019
Heat Seekers
Top Gear South Africa

Heat Seekers

Welcome to the world of wind-in-your-hair motoring... presuming you have hair, that is...

time-read
5 mins  |
November 2019
Stage Craft
Top Gear South Africa

Stage Craft

A GP circuit, all to ourselves... so what do we do? Head off and find some dirt roads. Because rally

time-read
7 mins  |
November 2019
Hot Wings
Top Gear South Africa

Hot Wings

Move over, road-legal minnows, it’s time for the serious machinery to pound the circuit...

time-read
4 mins  |
November 2019
Drives - S'Charged Thunder
Top Gear South Africa

Drives - S'Charged Thunder

Let’s start with the name: Velar SVAutobiography Dynamic, or SVAD for short.

time-read
8 mins  |
November 2019
Circuit Breaker
Top Gear South Africa

Circuit Breaker

Petrol A45 AMG takes on electric Model 3. Now, who turned out the lights?

time-read
5 mins  |
November 2019
The Need For Speed
Top Gear South Africa

The Need For Speed

Breaking the 480kph barrier has become an obsession for the hypercar manufacturers. Here’s the story of how Bugatti got there first

time-read
5 mins  |
October 2019
Man On The Moon
Top Gear South Africa

Man On The Moon

How TG faked our Moon landing – not with Stanley Kubrick, but with a trip to Cancún.

time-read
6 mins  |
October 2019
Voltswagen The People's EV?
Top Gear South Africa

Voltswagen The People's EV?

Ten years down the line, will the answer to every car-buying question be “Just get an ID.3”?

time-read
5 mins  |
October 2019
Rover's Return
Top Gear South Africa

Rover's Return

Carrying the Defender into the modern century is intimidating but those put off by Discovery’s looks can now stay within the brand.

time-read
7 mins  |
October 2019