How to Nail a Fail

Junior Writer Harriet Sim dons her student cap to find out whether getting an F is the key to success

- Harriet Sim dons

It’s not often I find myself hugging a stranger. But on a quiet Thursday night in an empty office space, here I am. The evening begins like most social get-togethers. Small talk around a generous charcuterie spread. Games and debates, laughter and wine. You’d be forgiven for thinking I was at a house party with an old friend. In fact, I’m at the Sydney branch of global self-development center The School of Life. Tonight’s topic? How to fail.

Leading our workshop is Adam Jacobs, a philosopher and co-founder of Australia’s largest online fashion retailer, The Iconic. Before you scoff at a successful e-commerce mogul giving a talk about failure, hear him out. “Watching my siblings get married and start families, I realized that by giving all of my time to the business, I made a huge sacrifice to my personal life. That is my failure.”

The truth is, everyone fails. But, while success is championed and broadcast, failures aren’t often spoken about, and so we’re recklessly unprepared for them. “We perceive failure as a barrier to success, so as a result, we try to avoid it,” says psychologist Tara Hurster.

That’s why – along with a teacher, accountant, rookie film producer and 12 others – I’m learning how to fail. Over three hours, I start to confront my own resume of failures. Some come easily (such as my inability to cook) and others are a little harder to divulge (people I’ve let down, words left unsaid and my debilitating fear of rejection).