'Learn How To Please Yourself First' –and Other Sex Tips From Our Mums

Three mothers and daughters explain how talking openly to each other about sex, identity and pleasure has strengthened their relationship and enriched their love lives

- Rosie Mullender And O'sha Roddick

The average woman’s sex life is anything but predictable. From a drought in your twenties to the excitement of a revived and satisfying love life in your fifties, via fluctuating hormones which can crash your libido one minute and make you insatiable the next, there’s no way of knowing what might happen. The common misconception is that as we get older, we prefer less sex. But as we grow more confident in ourselves and our bodies the opposite can be true. So, does sex really improve with age? And could having a frank conversation with your own mother about her sexual journey lead to a more satisfying love life for you?

‘There’s a misconception that sex belongs to young people,’ says research fellow Dr David Lee, who compiled a study on sexual satisfaction across the decades for The University of Manchester. While statistics may show that millennials are having more sex than older women, they’re experiencing half as many orgasms*. ‘With age comes increased awareness of our own kinks and idiosyncrasies and a more relaxed approach with our partners, which is conducive to great sex,’ says family therapist Stefan Walters.

So, what life lessons can we learn from our mothers when it comes to sex? We spoke frankly to three mums and their daughters about how their experiences have shaped their erotic lives.

‘MUM OPENED UP ABOUT HER OWN QUEERNESS’

Artist Sam Roddick, 47, ran erotic boutique Coco De Mer, before becoming a politically charged agitator. Her daughter O’sha Roddick, 20, is currently based in New York and studying journalism.