Anatomy of a Transformation

The beauty of transformation which by definition means a "thorough or dramatic change"-is that it's attainable, no matter how daunting. Sometimes it's as easy as just doing it. Sometimes it takes a therapy sesh (or two, or three) to get there. Sometimes all you need is a chat with a friend who succeeded in order to kick-start your own. We've got expert insights into what helps, as well as stories from women who've been there. The new you awaits....

So You Wanna Change...

Using science-based strategies is key, so we talked to three experts who work with women who want to alter something in their life. Here, the most effective (and doable) methods that truly work for the long haul.

GET SUPER CLEAR ON YOUR ENDGAME

"If you don't know what you're working toward, you don't know where you're going," says Jessica Smedley, PsyD, a clinical psychologist in private practice in Washington, D.C., and an adjunct professor at George Washington University.

"The more specific you can be, the more connected you are to what that means." Also important to suss out on the front end: a reasonable pace and time frame.

IDENTIFY YOUR MOTIVATION (AND SHIFT IT, IF NECESSARY)

Is the desire coming from you or someone else? That's the difference between an intrinsic motivator and an extrinsic one, says WH advisor Chloe Carmichael, PhD, a clinical psychologist and the author of Nervous Energy: Harness the Power of Your Anxiety. "Intrinsic motivation has the highest success rate because there's less resistance." It means you're actually pursuing a goal versus just making a display of it. If you need to go from extrinsic to intrinsic, borrow inspo from "motivational interviewing," a method Carmichael says is popular in the addiction space (but not limited to that usage). Ask yourself, What will happen if I'm able to make this change? Then list the benefits. Next, ask, What would happen if I did not make this change? Write the downsides. "Getting in touch with the facts can awaken your intrinsic desire," says Carmichael.