Relatively Lovely
New Zealand Listener|August 11-17 2018

In-law jokes aside, it’s worth fostering good relations with your spouse’s parents.

Marc Wilson
Relatively Lovely

It is entirely coincidental that my in-laws have come to visit and I’m writing about in-laws. It is all the fault of [censored], a colleague whose observations set me thinking, “What does science have to say about in-law relationships?”

Amazon has a lot of movies and TV series about in-laws, and I think it’s fair to say two things: as a rule they tend to dwell on the negatives of the relationship; and mothers-in-law, in particular, receive the pointy end of the stick. Prosecution enters into evidence Monster-in-law, Evil-in-law, Murder-in-law, etc.

It’s been suggested that the crazy notion of marrying for love is a relatively new thing in Western society, and that until little less than a century ago, the point of getting married wasn’t to gain a spouse so much as to garner the extended-family benefits that go along with nuptials.

Although this may no longer be explicitly the case, the value of an extended family is obvious now as always – family, be it yours or that of your spouse, can be a source of financial, physical and emotional support.

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