Introverts: Misunderstood Or Misanthropes?

‘Hell is other people at breakfast.’ I was sad to discover this was a misquote; I found it so apt. French existentialist Jean-Paul Sartre’s original line reads, quite simply: ‘Hell is other people.’ Punchier, sure, but also a bit harsh. Either way, the general sentiment is bound to resonate with at least some of you. You know who you are.

- Liesl Robertson

According to some studies, a third to half of all Americans are introverts – that’s one out of every two to three people. And, given that Americans are a decidedly ‘HEY, LOOK AT ME’ nation, the number is bound to be at least as high, if not higher, in other parts of the world. Finnish people, for instance, are notoriously introverted, as evidenced by this Finnish joke: How do you know if a Finn likes you? He is staring at your shoes instead of his own.

If 50 percent sounds like a lot, that’s because the world is filled with introverts passing themselves off as extroverts. ‘I’d say 90 percent of my acquaintances don’t even know that I’m an introvert because I take such pains to hide it,’ writes self-professed introvert Jessica Pan in her recent book, Sorry I’m Late, I Didn’t Want to Come. ‘After-work drinks? Sorry, I’m very busy. Lunch at the pub? Can’t, I have plans (eating ramen alone in blissful solitude). Co-workers just think that inside the office I’m distracted, and outside the office, I have a full social calendar and debilitating face blindness.’

But why? Well, that’s due to what author Susan Cain calls ‘the extrovert ideal’: the pervasive belief that being ‘gregarious, alpha and comfortable in the spotlight’ is what we should all be striving for.

In her book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Won’t Stop Talking, she writes: ‘We like to think that we value individuality, but all too often we admire one type