Father-Son Relationship

There is no other feeling of pride like when a father holds his newly born son for the first time in his arms.

It is the beginning of one of the most fulfilling yet challenging relationships. The father sees himself in his son and the son will eventually discover himself in his father. Because the father was first, he has to guide the son. However, the son will eventually challenge the father's guidance when he thinks he has become his father. It can be very complicated.

The first thing a father should do when entering into this lifelong complex relationship is to cleanse himself of whatever issues he might have had with his own father. Forgive. The hurt, regret, hatred, or anger our fathers' actions might have directed towards us may dwell in our subconscious minds. They may form part of our personalities. These feelings may eventually resurface as we interact with our sons. Forgiveness, therefore, heals the past, and brightens the future.

That is because boys hero-worship their fathers when they are still very young. At this age, you are like a god to them because you have all the answers to whatever perplexes them. Now, imagine the innocent and trusting son being met with the unintentional manifestation of symptoms of the ill feelings from our past with our fathers. This is what most fathers try to correct, but are unable to do so because they do not forgive. They usually realize the impact, after much introspection, when their sons react.

Boys, unlike girls(except tomboys), enjoy rough and tumble in their play. This kind of play gives them the ability to cope with future life's struggles and to stand up and do something about them. The absence of this kind of play gives rise to a young man who may fail to challenge life as an independent, but rely on others. This is where fathers come in. During the play, a boy will apply physical strength as he tries to overpower an opponent or obstacle blocking him from winning.