Clash of clans: Festive edit

Set boundaries, ask your own questions, prep for the prying moments. Here's how to survive the family gathering without going nuts

- Karishma Kuenzang

Sigh. Another festive season. Another dolled-up family party. Another trap. Relatives want to know why you're not married, why your start-up hasn't got Series A funding, why your waistline isn't what it was 10 years ago, and why your Insta is private.

"The thought of being in a zone where one's life choices are constantly judged pushes people away from family celebrations," says Bengaluru psychotherapist and relationship coach, Delnna Rrajesh. Chandni Tugnait, psychotherapist and founder-director of Gateway of Healing, Gurugram, adds that being exposed to judgement about a year's worth of life choices tends to make people feel worse about their decisions.

Set boundaries, both say. It's not just okay, it's actually empowering. Amid the laughter and the sweets, everyone's watching and silently taking cues on how to treat younger relatives who've grown up. "It's your responsibility to help others understand how they can or cannot treat you" says Rrajesh.