THE UPSIDE OF GETTING YOUR CAR STOLEN
Bicycling US|Winter 2024
AFTER I PARKED AT THE LAFAYETTE COLLEGE track for my workout, I did what I always do: I put my phone and wallet in the center console of my car and took the car key off the ring so I could fit it into the tiny pocket inside my running shorts.
THEO KAHLER
THE UPSIDE OF GETTING YOUR CAR STOLEN

I headed out for a 15-minute warmup jog around the adjacent neighborhood in Forks Township, Pennsylvania. Then I took my backpack and water down to the track and knocked out some quick intervals, in prep for a mile race that weekend.

At the end, as I returned from my 10-minute cooldown jog in the neighborhood, something felt off. My bag was gone. No worries, I thought. Someone had probably taken it to lost and found. But wait-I forgot to put the car key in my shorts on my cooldown. I left it in the bag! I walked to the locker rooms on the other side of the soccer and lacrosse fields. Nothing. As I exited, I looked across the grass. Where my car had stood just a minute earlier was a vacant parking space.

The car was gone.

At first, I was convinced my eyes were deceiving me. Who would have stolen my bag and my car in broad daylight? The track is at the back of the athletic complex, not visible from the main road. The idea seemed inconceivable. I stared down the empty spot, hoping I was imagining it.

Then I snapped to reality. I sprinted across the street to the rec soccer fields, where a sympathetic mom let me borrow her phone to call 911. The police came, eventually, but not before my car was long gone.

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