CATEGORIES

Musk's junk is scaring off the aliens

SPACE IS FULL OF SATELLITES

Kingpin jailed in drug hit

A GANG which smuggled in drugs worth up to £7billion has been jailed.

Keir's a big joke

A GAG about the PM's freebies topped a list of the best modern Christmas cracker jokes.

Shirl pie surprise

STRICTLY'S Shirley Ballas spread festive cheer by handing out thousands of free mince pies to the public.

BOFFS: LET'S SCOFF

Forget the diets this Christmas'

Pardon?

OUTRAGE AS PRES BIDEN WIPES HIS SON'S CONVICTION

Bowie: All you need is KNOB!

REPLACED 'LOVE' IN LYRICS WITH NAUGHTY WORD

UK TO GO NUCLEAR TO FEED AI

'Chernobyl fears are inaccurate”

MILITARY GAME

MILITARY chiefs will \"war game\" a major conflict involving Britain to test if we can summon frontline equipment at short notice.

FARM SUPPORT

PUBLIC support for a nationwide farmers' strike is up there with NHS nurses and action by ambulance staff.

GAME OF THRONES

Slot gives Pep a hefty kick in crown duel

Gun shot to bits as Kop stars shine

MANCHESTER CITY did not pay a penny to bring back Ilkay Gundogan from Barcelona.

YOU ZIRKZEE THING

Amorim must be a genius... he's even got goal-shy Joshua firing!

PISTOL BLASTS RIVAL

MARK ALLEN bit back at Shaun Murphy as their war of words escalated at the UK Championship.

Yafai on a high as he eyes Japan

GALAL YAFAI would happily head back to Japan to win a world title in the country where he claimed Olympic gold.

BANG ON CARSE

Brydon groomed for the top says captain Ben

QATARSTROPHE

Lewis blows it as he predicts flat finish

ROBINS SOAR IN 'WARM' WINTER

RED robin numbers are rocketing across Britain.

COLE OF THE SEASON

Footie star dog moniker trend

SCHU AIDE £12M BLACKMAIL PLOT'

Bodyguard 'dark web threat' to F1 race icon family

Notting HELL carnival

'A WAR ZONE' POLICE

Back from the read

DECEASED WRITERS VOICE AUDIOBOOKS

It's keepy uppy with Rooneys..

STREAMERS IN BIDDING WAR

Mogg family's a KO..

FORMER MP Jacob Rees-Mogg has compared his wife to that of boxer Tyson Fury.

CAN'T SLEEP? HAVE SOME CHEESE

Latest advice U-turn

Boff: It's woolly thinking

THE woolly mammoth can never be brought back to life and we should ignore the scientists trying to \"de-extinct\" it, an expert has claimed.

Ta, Greenland

WINTER'S SET TO BITE WITH -13C ICY BLAST

WHY THE BEATLES COULDN'T LET IT BE

Found: Papers detail break-up

NO! HO! HO!

Young Brits opting for a dry Christmas

Accusers are just middle class women of a certain age..

ULRIKA: KEEP DIGGING CALL TO MOANING TELLY GROCER