Our guilt-free guide to…the end

Because rejection hurts. Even when you’re the one dishing it out.

- JENNIFER PARKER

It’s the kind of text that fills me with dread. A friend—not a super close one, but one I like—wanted my help with her English lit essay. The deadline was Monday. She’d only need a few hours of my time. Could she come over this weekend?

As my fingers loomed over the keys, I glanced at my planner and chewed it over. Hmm. I could probably squeeze her into my Saturday or Sunday if I switched a few things around, woke up earlier, stayed up later and skipped yoga with my mom. But even just thinking about it, I was already super stressed.

The truth was, I just didn’t want to do it. I wanted to have those hours to tackle my mountain of homework. And then just chill. Part of me wanted to “be nice” and “help out a friend.” And while I do love being a nice, helpful friend, sometimes, the answer is “not this time.”

It was awkward, but I made my decision. I was ready to text back and say “no.” But here’s the thing: Saying no, even when you aren’t on the fence about it, can still be tricky. Especially when you’re nervous about damaging the relationship.

The good news is that turning people down gets easier with practice and repetition. And having the right script—a starting point, so you’re not staring at a blank screen—can make all the difference.

So, whether you need to ditch a bud, a bae or a babysitting gig, here’s your step-by-step to a speedy exit off any route that’s going awry.

THE PERSON WHO’S CRUSHING ON YOU

THE SITCH

The semi-obnoxious guy in Spanish class likes you. He says he wants to study vocab together. It’d be one thing if he were nice enough to be friends with—or someone you were actually into— but he doesn’t really fit into either category.