Dragging my feet to the kitchen, I swiped the open bottle from the counter and refilled my wine glass. But before taking a sip, I stopped myself. I couldn't carry on like this. It was June 2018 and I'd been drinking more than usual since losing my husband Ben to bowel cancer 10 months earlier. During the day I kept busy, staying strong for our girls, Georgina, then five, and Harriet, 23 months but when they were in bed and I was alone, I'd collapse in a pit of grief, drinking several glasses of wine to numb the pain.
Of course I always felt rubbish the following morning. I'm not going to drink tonight, I'd tell myself, but it never worked. Until that evening in June 2018, two months before the first anniversary of Ben's death. I asked myself, 'What would Ben want?" And I knew he'd tell me to live my life as wholly as possible. So I made a promise to myself to stop drinking once and for all.
STEP BY STEP
This story is from the {{IssueName}} edition of {{MagazineName}}.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber ? Sign In
This story is from the {{IssueName}} edition of {{MagazineName}}.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber? Sign In
MAGNIFICENT MAURITIUS
Pe This istand in the ut 7% Indian Ocean feels Sa: like paradise, says Charlotte Richards
I HATE BEING A MUM
One woman, 55, reveals why she resents all of the sacrifices she made to be a mother
SLASH SUGAR AND SLIM
Trying to lose weight? With these clever tweaks, you don’t have to miss out on the seasonal sweet stuff
DAWN HARPER ASK THE DOCTOR
Doctor Dawn Harper answers all your questions
SEX HORRORS SOLVED!
Stop physical intimacy from turning into the stuff of nightmares with our expert advice
THE TRUTH ABOUT LIFE WITH CANCER
More than 12,000 people are diagnosed with brain tumours each year in the UK. Two mums tell us how the cruel disease changed their lives forever
DAWN NEESOM MIND OF MY OWN
The Woman's Own columnist has her say on marriage, tea and Absolutely Fabulous!
TRAPPED INSIDE MY HOME WITH A MONSTER
Gemma Williams, 46, thought she'd die at the hands of her partner
AMANDA TO REPLACE CAT?
With increasing criticism directed at the This Morning host, are producers ready to call in a familiar face?
Get the GOSS
Your round-up of this week's biggest showbiz stories