HE TOOK MY TWIN FROM ME
WOMAN'S OWN|December 23, 2024
For Nicole Rawlings, 31, the new year only brings painful memories
CANDICE FERNANDEZ
HE TOOK MY TWIN FROM ME

Running through the snow, I felt a hand grab mine. It was my identical twin sister, Michelle. Laughing as icy flakes landed on our faces, we threw snowballs. It was Christmas 2001 and, aged eight, we were dressed in matching bobble hats and coats.

Born two minutes before me, Michelle took her role of big sister seriously. ‘I’ll always look out for you,’ she’d often vow.

While I was feisty, she was gentle and reserved and our parents’ nickname for her was Sunni after her love of sunflowers.

Growing up, we spent our days outdoors, playing basketball and making up hip-hop dances. We were always dressed exactly the same, but we loved it, and it’s true what they say about twin telepathy – if Michelle fell over I’d feel her pain, and if I cried her eyes would water.

We did everything together and that Christmas Eve, like every other year, we made cookies for Santa. Next morning, we were the first ones up, waking up our parents Brenda, then 40, and Michael, 41, and our brothers Michael, 18, Kevin, 13, and sister Lekisha, 15. Christmas was our favourite time of year and as the years passed, me and Michelle still shared special festive moments – shopping, going to church, seeing the Christmas lights.

After graduating from uni in December 2015, we got jobs working together in social care and even rented flats next door to each other. And in our spare time, we coached a girls’ basketball team, passionate about helping young people.

Then in early 2016, Michelle reconnected with a school friend, Tyshawn Buckner, then 23. I wanted Michelle to be happy but while I remembered Tyshawn as a smiling boy at school, he seemed different now – bad-tempered and moody.

‘Why do you like him?’ I asked Michelle one day.

‘I just do,’ she shrugged, and I had to respect that, even if I didn’t understand what she saw in him.

Then in late 2016, she had big news. ‘I’ve got a new job,’ she said.

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