CATEGORIES
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'8 month hay fever' not to be sneezed at
POLLEN AGONY
Kloppelganger
LOOKALIKE'S JOB FEAR AS JURGEN QUITS
RAIL MISERY FOR EASTER PASSENGERS
Strikes & line closures hell
Fae has his eyes on prize
HOSTS Ivory Coast will continue to draw strength from adversity as they seek to complete one of the great Africa Cup of Nations comebacks against Nigeria today.
Jord to get Ajax armband
JORDAN HENDERSON is set to be named the new captain of Ajax.
Rod Star
MUNIZ TURNS ON THE MAGIC
TIME TO MOVE ON UP
FEW clubs like to live in the past more than Manchester United.
FARBY: BET ON ROOTY
JOE ROOT must become England’s batting superglue once more if the tourists want to savour sweet series success in India.
PRIDE & GROOM
Battle of beards
CELLETUBBIES
TUBBIES ‘Jailers’ offered Dipsy new look as kiddie cons ‘scared’
TAKEAWAHEY
Sizzling kebab scoffers ranked top in bedroom
JAMIROQUAI STAR DIES IN CAR CRASH
Jay & band's heartbreak on bassist Derrick, 66
RAID BULL
Shoplifters target energy drinks
LOVESICKIES
Staff off with broken hearts on Valentine’s
ABBEY: ALIENS BUZZED MY CAR
Three UFOs on the A3
IT'S FLOODY VALENTINE
Not much to love as storms hit
Ozzy's going bats at Kanye
RAPPER 'HAS NICKED SONG'
£3.4BN IN GOVT DEALS FOR FUJITSU
..despite Post Office fiasco
DEALS OR NO DEAL!
'Frustrated' ETH is after new players - or he's off
PLACE IN OUR HEARTS
We have to give our all for the Busby Babes
DON'T GO DOWN DRAIN, MAINOO
Some sound advice for kid who has world at his feet
BIRTHDAY BLOWOUT
Zak gets no party favours
Fake eyelashes gone in a blink
SHOPLIFTERS TARGET £1 FALSIES
IT'S A GIANT SLEEP
Astronaut dreams
DEL'S JAM IS CUSHTY
Only Fools star's homemade jars
SPOT THE BILL
Fans spending more on footie than the missus
TEAM JAZ
Footie mad Traitors star wants to have 11 kids..
Jab's the 'dawn of new age'
CANCER BREAKTHROUGH
Craig: The truth is spaced out there..
STONED STAR SAW UFO FLEET
Me to loo! Paul's phantom flusher
CHUCKLE BRO CHILD GHOST TOILET TAUNT