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I had to get out or everyone would die
TUTOR RELIVES DANCE CLASS KNIFE HORROR
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No rush for Top Gun Tom
TOP Gun Three will only fly to the screen when Tom Cruise believes audiences will be \"fully entertained.\"
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Boffs: We're gonna need a lot of nukes
ASTEROID WIPEOUT PLOY
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Tell me what you did at work or I'll fire you
ELON BRANDED A 'D*CK'
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Prowse about that then?
BORN-AGAIN James Ward- Prowse is still coming to terms with his second coming at West Ham but admitted: \"I've got a lot to prove.\"
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Sharon family valued
SHARON Horgan says her daughters take the mickey when they see her in sex scenes.
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My son shines the brightest!
MARTIN ON DAD DUTY
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SALAH BRATE GOOD TIMES
Marvellous Mo puts sad City to the sword
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EYESIGHT ALERT ON SCREENS
Young myopia epidemic
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Pain in the arts
STUDENTS' BOTTICELLI 'TRIGGER' WARNING
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Two doctors are worth more than a box ticker
Exactly what is wrong in Britain today, the post of a diversity officer was advertised in the NHS and the salary was twice as much as a junior doctor. WTF, we as a country are too busy trying not to say/do anything which may cause offence to a small minority of people, but it won't get the waiting list down.
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KET ON A HIGH
Craze for 'pink' drug cocktail behind surge
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Kev looks shot to bits
KEVIN DE BRUYNE fired a shot that went closer to the corner flag before he looked to the sky.
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BOTS NICK BOFF JOBS
AI seen as more effective in roles
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ROUGH & TUMBLE DRYERS umbro
Curry in spin cycle as Roses cling on for clean getaway
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DU WANT SOME?
Champ Dan in demand after missing Parker demolition job
Flirting gets on nerves
A FAMILY friend acts inappropriately around my man - and I'm sick of it.
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Hands off our tractors
GANGS OF RUSSIANS TARGETING UK FARMS
'Mutton chops' on trend
ELVIS Presley-style mutton chops sideburns are the ultimate style statement for men, fashion gurus say.
Floods of tears for kids
KIDS in areas that regu- larly flood fear rain and suffer \"sky-rocketing\" men-tal health issues.
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Battling Liam living in hope
LIAM LIVINGSTONE admitted England are yet to get to grips with the fluctuating conditions in Pakistan but he is still hopeful about their Champions Trophy prospects.
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Horny fella wants live-in threesome
| DON'T HAVE A CHOICE
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Prue in Bake finale?
DAME Prue Leith says the next series of The Great British Bake Off may be her last.
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HEAVY PETAL
Bruce wanted Iron Maiden to swap rock for folk music
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PUTTING ON THE BLITZ
Forest torn to shreds in 12-min goal rush
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It will be Mint for Enders to get gongs
SOAP'S CAST 'BEST'
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Birthday blues for red Gary
GARY Neville's pet hate is getting \"happy birthday\" messages from his friends and family.
Delap backed to ensure his team survive
DARA O'SHEA is backing \"dying breed\" Liam Delap to drag Ipswich out of trouble.
DEFT LEOPARD
New recruit O'Neill slays Giants
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Closest encounters
NASA'S BIGGEST MISSION TO FIND ALIEN LIFE EVER