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IT'S ODE TO JOY FOR MIK'S GUNS
Fit-again Martin & Saka rule the show
QUICK SMART
Butch: Kiwis a test
Keep your Eds
FANS SHOULDN'T BOO OLD BOSS
You're licked! Worst doggy sock thieves
RETRIEVERS RATED CRIMINAL LEG-ENDS
THE KINKY WRINKLIES
Boomers' booty calls
Look at the size of those pigs in blankets Doreen!
NUDIST XMAS DINNER AT PUB
Cher: I saw Jesus face on curtains..
STAR BELIEVED IN ANGELS & SPIRITS
SWEAR WE GO!
Man U fans worst for foul language
GHOST'S SEVERED HEAD IN MY BED
Bloodshot-eyed freak 'lifted up the sheets'
It's dinner crime
JAILBIRDS MOAN ABOUT COLD PIES
We pay for MPs' £30M bar bills
BOOZE DEAL SPARKS FURY
Nerdy games more popular than footie
COMPUTER GEEKS OUTNUMBER FANS
KILLER BERT HERE TO STAY
Fallen tree kills man, 64, as worst storm in 14 years continues to wreak havoc
Le Tiss turned into David Icke of footie
STELLING: HIS WEIRD VIEWS MIGHT HAVE GOT HIM AXE
POLICE CUTS 'PUT CRIMS ON STREET'
Cops' £500m budget blow
HARRY'S ON THE LASH AGAIN
Now Kane's had pop at clubs after withdrawals
I KANE GO ON AND ON
Winter break gives striker a bit of R&R
Red man walking
RVN GUTTED BY EXIT
EFFING 'N REFFING
Officials must wise up, it's not all about them
DUCK SUPER
Ben has fire in his belly over Ashes
Ridoto rules
FERGIE STRIKES GOLD AGAIN
Nice face, shame about the liege..
HENRY VIII WIFE MUG ON A TREE
Rob turns dead mog into robot
£30K TO BRING BACK CAT
WRESTLE IN PEACE
Legend of ring dead at 86
Gen Z want crusts cut off sarnies
WHAT A BUNCH OF SOFTIES
Definitely Maybe take out insurance
FANS FEAR OASIS NO-SHOW
It's eyes down for Brit kids
BINGO-MAD YOUNGSTERS
WATCH OUT FOR LITTLE BIGFOOT!
Nippers on the prowl in deep woods
BEAKING POINT
Birds pack out RSPCA sanctuaries
People called John are tops for trumps
BIG FARTERS ARE NAMED & SHAMED