CATEGORIES

Don't put yer footie in it Keir

LABOUR LEADER TOLD TO DITCH THREE LIONS

ATTACK OF THE FERAL CHICKENS

Clucking birds misery for village

Dank holiday

Experts: Expect a total washout

'SHAKESPEARE PLAYS PENNED BY A WOMAN'

WILLIAM Shakespeare's plays were written by a woman, according to a new book.

DON'T TELL HIM YOUR NAME PIKE

No jail for National Service dodge

KOBBIE DAZZLER

Mainoo's teen dream becomes reality in his breakthrough season

DOUBLE DOUBLE DATE

Walker's ready to seize the day and make history

SUITS LEW SIR!

Brit's move will be Toto success

It'll be Mo of the same

ALI HAPPY TO BE LEFT HOLDING THE BABY

JOSH THE BOSH

Taylor vows to launch his second coming in rematch

CAW BLIMEY..

Boffs reveal clever crows count out loud

I'M SICKIE OF SNOWFLAKES

Grafter Craig blasts work-shy Gen Z

'IT SOUNDED LIKE A BOMB'

Majorca bar collapse shock

BARTON 'NONCE' SLUR LIBEL LOSS

First court round in Vine's favour

PLANET BIGGLES

Tories: Rishi's love of private jets does little damage to the climate ...and PM is defended by his Energy & Net Zero Secretary!

HELLYFISH!

Monsters leave daytrippers too scared to swim

Sink your teeth into Drac facts

BRAM BOOK A BLOODY MARVEL

OUT OF OFFICE

Stephen: Classic show would flop now with all the workers on Zoom

SMASHED IT!

Classic dish gets gourmet upgrade

Didgeridoo this to stop hubby snoring

BREATHING TRICK CUTS THE SNORTS

AI boffin: Let's give everyone free cash!

INCOME CALL AS BOTS NAB OUR JOBS

I'LL BE BASIL..

Cleese eyes Arnold for Lookalikes show

BY GEORGE, IT'S WEMBER-GLEE

Williams gives Sam's Wolves final shot

They get knocked down (but they get up again)

LUTON MEET FATE WITH PRIDE AND RESOLVE TO RETURN ONCE MORE

There you arrrrrrgh!

VANISHED PIRATE KING RIDDLE SOLVED

WE OWE THE FANS BIG TIME

Dalot determined to pay debt

I'LL BRING THE NOISE

Lopetegui to stamp his style on Hammers

YOU LITTLER BEAUTY!

Nine-dart Luke in tears after crowning glory

COMING UP MOSES

English life is my cup of tea says Saints ace

NOT ECONOMIC

Dante hero misses Derby