CATEGORIES

CALL THE POOLICE!

Uni students ‘inside jobbie’

HandyMan Utd

'SHED DEVILS’ LOOK TO SIGN ODD-JOB STAR

PUTIN LOOKALIKES PLAN TO BEAT RAP

War crimes despot ‘hundreds of doubles’

Beeb plot to replace Gary with a robot

BBC’S A.I. PRESENTERS PLAN

PRUE'S LOCKED IN LOO ORDEAL

Bog drama brings relief

SEND US YOUR CV TO FIND E.T.

Space agency alien hunters jobs ad

TO BALDLY GO

Slaphead Midge: People think STAR TREK I’m Patrick

SIREN ALERT ON MOBILES

Don’t panic! It’s just a warning

Call of duty

HOWE’S BACKING HIS EURO STAR WILSON

Stokes battles on but warned pressure of IPL can take its toll

BEN STOKES insists he will fulfil his IPL commitments despite ongoing issues with his troublesome left knee.

Webb's return is key to first win of Gat's second stint

WALES recorded a first win of their Guinness Six Nations campaign after beating Italy at Stadio Olimpico.

NAIL BIRDS

Lags learn how to do manicures

LEG-LESS! SHORTEST LADS ARE UP NORTH

Strides behind the tallest towns

E.T.PHONE N.I.

Northern Ireland is aliens hotspot

AND THEY ARE HAVING IT OFF

Fans get frisky at the races

WINTER? IT'S NOT OGRE YET

Norwegian blast to bring back snow, ice and gales

The Viv: I give a Hol lot of ideas

‘HOST IS COPYING MY STYLE’

IT'S EARMAGEDDON

BBC scores own goal as stars go on strike to back 'axed' Gary | Chaos as BBC shows cancelled | Pundits & commentators in walkout | Fans cheer presenter at footie match

Changing Fooms

LLB: PEOPLE KEEP MIXING UP DAVE GROHL & MYSELF

£20BN BILL TO GO GREEN

..and it’s footed by taxpayer

WEESTMINSTER

MPs and staff working_`amid stench of urine'

Will's haunted by Sarah scene

WILL Mellor says he felt \"physically sick\" when he visited the spot where Sarah Everard was snatched and wishes he could have helped her.

'BREKKIE TV HAS BECOME BIG BOREFEST'

Johnny Vaughan: It's just dull

Gen Z get money tips on TikTok

HALF of under-25s use the app TikTok for financial advice and money tips, with one in six saying they trust everything they read on social media.

Joanna: I cried out Pa, will you look after me?' & he did

LUMLEY TELLS OF BOAT TERROR

Map your coronation check-ins

PEOPLE have been urged to share how they will celebrate King Charles's coronation on a digital map being set up by the Government.

RUSSIA CLOSING IN ON CITY

THE Ukrainian city of Bakhmut is being hit by heavy gunfire after it was \"practically encircled\" by Russian paramilitaries.

WACKO PUTIN

Despot kips in oxygen tank like pop legend. Vlad builds 'Neverland' at mega-mansion

NOW BEAST'S FROM NORTH

Chills of -14C to freeze Britain

At last.. there's belly good news

SIX-PACKS A 'HAZARD' TO OUR HEALTH